What's up in your Corner of the Valley?

18:50 hrs.
08 Sep 15

     So, how's it hanging? What's up in your neck of the woods?

     Word has it a logging truck dumped its load on Hwy 19, effectively blocking both sides of the divided highway and closing it between Hamm to Dove Creek Road. Speaking of blockages, today was the first day of school for all the little yard apes and couch monkeys. My two Loin Fruits wandered into their educational institution to retrieve their class schedules. No real issues. They pretty much got the classes the needed or wanted. Now, will they excell in those classes? They'll get out what they put in and to the victor the spoils. Of course, they don't understand this concept because they are of the experience no failure generation.

     Pure un-adulterated Bullshit!

     Hey Kidlets...its time to wake up and smell the stench of fear. The fear of failing. Its a huge part of life and its gonna happen. So, get used to it. Improse, Adapt and Overcome. (Just a little something I learned from Clint Eastwood in the movie Heartbreak Ridge. Its a bit dated now, but if you haven't seen it it's high time you did.)

     Have you had a problem with bambis on the roadways? There is an awful lot of them around the Valley, especially near THE WAYWARD INN. Several large (six points or more) stags have been seen stalking the does. The rut is starting in earnest. Up on the Beaufort mountains the bull elk will be herding the cows and bulging to their rivals. If you're OUT IN THE WEEDS you just might hear them. And speaking about hearing things OUT IN THE WEEDS, Dr. J. Bindernagel has headed off to Malcolm Island to check out a 'squatch that has been vocalizing near some residences on a fairly regular basis. I wish I had the opportunity to go and do my own investigation. Yes, Dr. John is a biologist but he's too much the scientist. Always looking for other reasons. Hey John, how about using Occam's Razor for a change. The results just might surprise you.

     Have you been following the electioneering? I hope you have. I have tried to contact our local candidate and all I have only heard (and received ) lip service. I have received no answers to my very important questions. I'm in a quandary. I like this party. I have supported this party but if I don't get the answers to my questions then I will cast my ballot elsewhere.  You should be doing the same. Ask questions of your candidate and if you don't get the answers you like take your vote to a different party. Do Not spoil your ballot. Be part of the solution. Neglecting to vote means you have no right to complain about a politicians actions if you could gave removed him from office. Whether is civic, provincial or federal. Get out and VOTE.

     I am happy to announce that one of my favourite strip cartoonist has returned to the panel. Berkeley Breathed has restarted his famous satirical comic as -  Bloom County 2015. In my opinion Bloom County is one of the better strips out there. The character are complex,  dynamic and cute too. In fact, I have Opus tattooed on my back.

     So, the Loin Fruits did their initial day at school. They returned with a sheet of paper entitled "Protocol and Consent Form". On was a series of boxes to be checked that we, both parent/guardian and student, have read and understand the Rules of the School, including the consequences of non-compliance. It's purely an administrative form that the school board uses so if they have to punt your kid out because he's being a little shit they don't have to explain to you the reason why.

Super Shifty Shady

09:45 hrs.
30 Aug 15

     My BETTER HALF has pointed out to me a rather significant point. A rather obvious point that is often overlooked. A point that smacks of obfuscation on a massive scale. Here's the point: If you ran a company that consistently could not pay its bills your company would not be in business for very long. So, why is it the federal government can run a deficit (not pay its bills) for eight consecutive years and we (the creditors) think its okay to do so? And now, in the midst of a very long election campaign, the ruling party suddenly comes up with a $5 b. surplus. What happened? Did they raid the Canadian Pension Fund (once again) to balance the books? Or, change the EI funding by increasing the payroll deductions while eliminating entire training programs (and thus saving monies). Or, raid the Superannuation Funds, the federal employee's pension fund, of profits earned (that would have aided is sustaining the fund itself).

    
     A word to the wise, please be careful of polititians who suddenly present gifts from a cupboard that was previously empty.

     For a real giggle look for the YouTube video called "Harperman". Written and performed by a scientist (muzzled by the feds) the song recites the litany of PM Harper's actions over his two terms in office.

     School will soon be in session. Can't wait. Although both of our Loin Fruits worked their tail feathers off their current lack of focus and direction has left them wandering about like the Lost Tribes of Israel. For myself and my LOBSTER, the start of the school year would provide stability in the home before The Sages arrive and we bug out to vacation in A Foreign Land. As for us taking any additional schooling, there will always be something new to learn so the chance are probably pretty good that we will both be cranking out term papers as well.

     Had enough rain yet?
     The answer had better be no. In order to replenish the waters in the forests, lakes and streams the VALLEY needs several weeks of a steady drizzle. A hard rain will not soak into the ground and may cause local flooding, so the order of business should be Slow and Steady.

16:15 hrs.

     Do you have a needy person in your life? Not a person in need. One who you are happy to help out of the goodness of your heart. In fact, everyone should be willing to help anyone in need, if they can. No, I am talking about a self centred individual who, under the guise of needing a favour, twists every encounter and every outing into a personal focus session. Now this particular individual is a warm giving person but the reciprocal demands far outweigh anything put forward. And there is always a catch or a hook that traps you into having to another stressful interaction that has to go their way. For lack of a better term, I have decided to label this person "Driving Miss Daisy" the ultra needy character portrayed by Jessica Tandy.

     Is there a need, want or complaint you wish to voice? There is an online Facebook forum for the VALLEY called "Comox Valley Rants and Raves". Like any online forum group it has its share of Whack-a-doos. Some individuals actually try to help one another. Others are just trolls. If nothing else its a good chuckle.

In the COMFORT ZONE

Blaine 07:30 hrs
23 Aug 15

     Our visitors at THE WAYWARD INN, Li'l Bro and His Lobster, have pretty much settled in. I am sure that there was much trepidation on the part of His Lobster what with coming to stay in the nest of my Lobster. Not too worry. With the help of the Inn Keepers open hospitality, Chef Blaine's fixins and a lot of wine everything went as smooth as silk.

     They, whoever the hell they are, say that opposites attract. Well, these two are certainly the poster kids for the rule. He's mechanical down to earth gonna kill it and eat it I've got your six my word is my bond. She's organized to the Nth degree white collar high end glitz enjoy life with a huge open heart. But truly believe me when I say that they are LOBSTERS.

     So, we did the tourist thing with them. Cathedral Grove, Coombs and Qualicum Bay. We added the Coastal Black Winery on our list as we know His Lobster enjoys wine. This was great as I was able to enjoy it too as my BETTER HALF doesn't indulge in the grape. But, if you didn't know this, the Coastal Black Winery makes all their wines from berries and honey. That's right they are making the ancient wine called mead. If you have never tried it, I strongly suggest that you do. Its worth it. Unfortunately, because work commitments, His Lobster has to wing her way back to the Flatlands.

06:15
25 Aug 15

     Li'l Brother and I headed out to Mohun Lake yesterday and brought home six nice cutty's. We spotted a herd of elk on the way in. A dozen cows and one big racked bull. Looks like the rut maybe coming to the Island sooner than expected. When I took Loin Fruit #1 into work this morning (for his last work day) I spotted three of the local four-hooved hoodlums trotting along Bolt Avenue. They weren't feeding. Rather, they were keeping tabs on their competitors and starting to search out the does. If the residents of the VALLEY thought the deer were a pain in the ass over the summer it is nothing compared to when The Rut is on. Thank goodness it only happens once a year when the does go into estrous driving the bucks mad with desire.

     It should be noted that the traffic moving over the 17th Street Bridge is getting stupid. Not just in volume, which can easily be handled by the bridge deck, but in the approach lanes to the bridge. There are so many vehicles wanting to cross over that they are extending beyond the approach lanes and into the intersections. This situation is only going to get worse. And this is where the short sighted town fathers & mothers should be looking to put in another bridge from Courtenay to Comox. Not some namby pamby bull shit pedestrian/cyclist bridge to cross the Courtenay River at 6th Ave. that will only be used by the hoodlums hanging around Simms Park after dark. What we need is a simple two lane bridge running from the bottom of 29th and ending up at the site of the old concrete silo on Dyke Road. Yes, it benefits Comox the most as it would allow the residents to bypass Courtenay when leaving or entering the Valley but it also benefits Courtenay by dropping the amount of traffic running all the way to the 17th St. bridge and then back again just to get to frickin Walmart.

Think about it.

Back at It

18:20 hrs.
17 Aug 15

     Well, THE WAYWARD INN was contacted by a friend from the Mainland. Youngblood is visiting his mom for a few days so I quickly adjusted my schedule to make some time to see him. He's a good guy to have watching your back when you're OUT IN THE WEEDS. Of course, this means you must be prepared to watch his back. Is this something you are prepared to do? Come to someone's aid without reservations? Who, among your friends, would step up to the plate?

06:45 hrs.
18 Aug 15

     My LOBSTER and I are heading out of country for a holiday. Sans Couch Monkeys!  A big surprise is that the Sages will be coming to The WAYWARD INN to watch over them. At one point the Sr. Loin Fruit thought we would let them gleefully fend for themselves. Sure, and skateboarding hoodlums are welcome to freely sample my collection of single malts.

     I hope that all of you are watching the slow grinding machinations of the federal election campaign. Remember that it is easy to tell when politician is lying. If his/her lips are moving it's a lie. The only remaining question is to what degee of falsehoods are you willing to live with. Once again, I implore you, Dear Readers,  to exercise size your right and vote.

10:20 hrs.

     We're busy prepping for our guests arrival this weekend. He was my Li'l Brother and she is his Entire World. They don't vacation often so the fact that they are coming to visit the WAYWARD INN is great.

     The news media has Thomas Mulcair on Vancouver Island today. It will be interesting to hear what he has to say for the residents of The Rock. More half truths and unfullfilled promises. My biggest concern is what will happen to the Canadian military if the NDP does form the government.

     Well, that's about it from here. Take care Dear Readers. It's time for lunch with Youngblood.

How Busy R U?

08:05 hrs.
14 Aug 15

     So? Have you been busy? Here at the WAYWARD INN I've been balancing one job at three locations while trying to reduce the size of my Honey-Do list. Been making some good headway too. Hopefully all of my efforts may eventually pay off.

     Actually, we've all been busy. My BETTER HALF is still battling a massive learning curve at her new position. But she has been told, by peoples in the know, that she must be doing things right as progress is being felt across the realm like rings on a pond.

     And the Loin Fruits?  Well, they've been unabashedly plugging away at their first real jobs to a great success. With the early shift at 05:30 hrs and going to 18:30 hrs. they have had to make sacrifices in their personal social calendars, despite its lack of event singularities. They actually have begun to appreciate the value of a dollar earned and have begun to take a harder view at some of their "associates" whose only source of income is derived from begging, whining and pleading their parental units. Obviously, they never never heard of Rule #2 - Whiners Get Nothing!

     The local Cage Liner reports that the arrival of the new vessel for the Buckley Bay Cable Ferry is delayed yet again. The BC FERRY Corruption is telling everyone who listen, which would be everyone except those who need to use this particular bateau, that it will be up and running by September. I still think that when the winter weather sets in that ferry may end up taking a Missouri Boat Ride down the length of the strait. For more details on the vessel's shortcomings check out www.sendintheclowns.info.

     There is an airshow at CFB tomorrow. Sorry I didn't give you any more of an advance warning but I simply cannot be your only source of info despite being the most articulate. Ha Ha! There will be the usual. A Twin Tailed Plastic Fag Jet, the Snow-chickens, the Shit-Hawks, a bunch of civie aerobatic stunt planes. I have no idea what the static birds will be. Supposedly there will be a C-17. That will be cool as will the Buffalo air demo. I guess I'm jaded. I once was deployed to Abbotsford as ground crew in 1985. If you want to see a premier airshow on the Left Coast that's the one to see. They had an F-22 Raptor air demo. Now that would have been a sight to see.

     Have you been watching Alone on the History channel?  The series has on episode left. Hopefully they will repeat it as I missed the first one. This show is far better than any Survivor reality game show. The only person to vote these contestants off is themselves. Being Out In The WEEDS, I wonder if they had any approaches?

    

On this date...

16:05 hrs.
06 Aug 15

     On this date, 70 years ago, the Japanese city of Hiroshima was destroyed by a single nuclear bomb dropped from an American B-29 bomber (named the Enola Gay). Two days later a second nuclear bomb was dropped on the city of Nagasaki. Hundreds of thousands of lives were lost and have continued to be lost from residual radiation poisoning.

     The American position was that if the Pacific Theatre of War would have continued on its current path the overall loss of life would have been ten fold. Therefore, in order to force the Japanese High Command to surrender these two devices were utilized.

     As recently as only two years ago the Japanese school system started to teach its students about its own military actions during WW II (forced labour camps, attacking Pearl Harbour, Korean women taken as sex slaves, etc.) This portion of Japanese history has not been taught for two generations.

Nearing the End

18:55 hrs.
04 Aug 15

     We are nearing the end.  Actually, we are more than just past the half way point of summer. But in some regards we are definitely nearing the end. Our Japanese student has only till the end of the week with us and then it will be Sayonara. While the two Loin Fruits are grinding their way through the Dish Pit at the CFB.  No complaints on either front so that makes my BETTER HALF and I pretty happy. And you know the old saying "Happy Wife, Happy Life".

     I remember when I was in the Eighth grade english class, Miss Pateman's class in Shuswap Junior Secondary. We had two immigrant students from Hong Kong, Tony and Tommy Mah. As a cultural bridging exercise, we had to do a report on where they were from. I did one on the origins of their language. I discovered that the basic written language  ideograms are based on the marks found on the back of a turtle. From their it was remarkably simply. The symbol of a house, a peaked roof and two straight lines, was just that - a house. Add the symbol of a wife and it became a home. A house with a pig was wealth. A house with a wife and a pig was happiness. A house with two wives was...discord.  Go figure.

     With our Japanese student leaving the WAYWARD INN will not be empty for long. My Little Brother and his Better Half will be arriving in a couple of weeks. Its been kinda hard to nail down their plans but I do know that we would like to play tour guide for them. Chef Blaine also needs to know any dietary restrictions if he is able to prepare any award winning dishes. Those of you who have supped at the WAYWARD INN will understand.

16:40 hrs
05 Aug 15

     Another day gone. Another day closer to the end. When some of our Japanese  students have left the WAYWARD INN there was a sense of loss. I don't know if we had made enough of a connection with this one. I hope that we have.

     On another note, there is a huge well spring, a ground surge that Ober Fuhrer Harper will be summarily be removed from office. Now, I will not counsel anyone to vote for any particular political party. It would be unconscionable to do so. But, I will emplore you to exercise your Right to Vote. There are so many places in this world where many citizens do not have the ability to affect change and yet nearly 50% of Canadians piss away this right. And that's for a federal election. It's even lower for a provincial or civic decision. I'm not saying you have to be as politico as our neighbours South of the 49th but if you don't take an interest and you don't vote then I don't want to hear you bitchin when your rax dollars are used to fund a one armed federal fart catcher to paint a portrait of the last known Beothuk in Newfoundland.