Time Flies!

14 Feb 22

11:55 hrs.

     Hello Kidlettes, 

     And a Happy Valentine's Day to you!

     There has a lot that has happened that we have to get caught up on so let's get started shall we?

     Yesterday was the Stupor Bowl in the Hugh-ess.  Big deal. Over 100,000 people packed into the stadium in La La Land to watch overpaid entertainers play the final game of this season's 'Merican rules football. Tickets to see the game in person ranged from $7K to $100K. That's an awful lot of money that could have been used to help people. A 30 second ad cost $6.5 million. That's a lot of cash for a beer commercial. I know some people who have debated the subject of pro sport salaries with me and I will not be moved from my position in that I feel that no one deserves to be paid (as an example) $50 million to play a sport for five years. Sure, that's what the market will bear but I say let's get realistic. How about $2 million per year and the rest of the salary must go to a charity? Imagine what could be accomplished?

     The Beer Flu protestors in the Nation's Capital and at selected border crossings to the Hugh-ess have clearly worn out their welcome and the Feds are in the process of enacting the Emergency Measures Act. This act is the revamped version of the War Measures act that Trudeau Sr. had dropped on Canuckistan during the FLQ crisis. Like father like son.

15 Feb 22

08:15 hrs

     There are more empty shops here in the Valley. For a variety of reasons they have had to close up. But the spaces are not being shuttered for long. One posh restaurant has been transformed into a bbq and patio furniture store and a Mexican restaurant that shuttered years ago is going to be a fried chicken joint.

     The other day our eldest went for a drive with my Better Half to River City. The went to the college campus and he picked up his text books for his courses at the end of the month. The smart money is on the notion that he will not crack them until he starts his first class. Surprised? No.

     Yesterday the Queens's Cowboys arrested thirteen people at a border crossing in the Redneck Province. In a search of the trucks they found weapons, ammunition  and body Armour. So much for a peaceful protest.

17 Feb 22

12:00 hrs

     This intrepid individual was yards into work today. A coworker had to deal with a medical emergency. So I stepped up. It's what is expected. It's what I do.

     On the Beer Trucker Rodeo Front...with the emergency measures act in place the Feds are having the banks dig into the accounts of the known attendees and if there is anything hinky their accounts will be frozen. I guess they'll have to buy their deisel with empty Cheetos bags from the sleeper cab. Those attendees with children or pets have been informed make arrangements for daycare or dog care in the event they are taken into custody. Additionally,  drivers licenses and vehicle insurance could be suspended. Saddle up buckaroos. It's going to be a bumpy ride.

21:30 hrs.

     The Waistrels have invaded the Wayward Inn. Invaded maybe too strong of a word since they were escorted in. If I didn't have too work I would find a means of escaping. It's a circular thing. If they keep down the noise I won't hear the pointless lack of real life experience rhetoric which will keep a grump vet at bay. The quieter they are the faster he will go to sleep. That doesn't mean I have to be quiet in the morning as I get ready for work. It's the price you have pay for being a Waistrel.

     I may not have mentioned it but one of the Travelling Cuz'ns Outlaws has been granted citizenship in the Great White North. We like him. He's a chef. A real one. Speaking of chefs, Chef Blaine has dictated more ideas for his next book I just have to find the time to type it out. I'm still thinking about inserting the recipes into the narrative or after the narrative. What do you think?

How about those Mother Truckers?

31 Jan 22

07:30 hrs

     Yes, how about those Mother Truckers? Clogging up our Nation's Capital with their rigs spewing deisel fumes and their demands. Now, here's the thing. The trucking associations across the Great White North have stated that up to 90% of their members have been vaccinated and if they are vaccinated and have their documentation in order they can cross the Hugh-ess border and back with no issues. I have a friend of mine - and he is a Redneck but one who has a fair bit of common dog - has been hauling goods back and forth since he was out of high school. His company informed him that to cross the border - in other words do his job - he had to be double dipped and papered. No problem since the alternative was no job. The Golden Horseshoe Cartage association has said that those drivers who do not want get vaccinated can simply continue to work inside the Great White North which they don't want to do as there is more money to be made crossing the border. 

     The science shows that being jabbed and masking up curbs the spread of the Beer Flu but these truckers and their hangers on - I'll get to those shit heads in a minute - are either ignorant of the facts or, as I was informed, know that these procedures are the best way to but don't want to be told that they have to do it. In other words, like any petulant child they are stomping their feet and blowing their air horns when confronted with the obvious. DO AS YOU ARE TOLD! 

     From across the country these rigs and pickups and motor homes have descended on our Nation's Capital. From what I saw it was quite the party with tailgate bbqs cooking brats and dancing - on the Nation's War Memorial - and arts and crafts with attendees painting slogans and swastikas on federal property. Ten thousand people looking for a washroom with none around so they flock to local restaurants where they are denied access because they are not vaccinated and they won't mask up. This dives them to one of the largest malls in the NCR and again because of their Redneckery they get punted out and the mall managers close the place down for a couple of days. 

     What started as a means to peacefully convey a message to the Feds that this hard working portion of our society has had enough of the rules and regulations. I get it. But, once their intentions were splayed across social media every frozen loon with an axe grind crawled out of his igloo strapped on his snowshoes and started marching towards The Hill. Unfortunately, there is no way the Feds are going to drop the requirements for unvaccinated people to cross the border into the Great White North. This means testing and a quarantine. Life's rough, but those are the rules and you might as well drive home instead of clogging up the streets. As for the free radicals within the protest be warned as the police forces are surfing social media and using facial recognition. You will be found. You will be charged. And the nation will know that you are a criminal. Just imagine little Janey explaining to her class during Show and Tell that "Yes, that was her mom gleefully dancing on the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier or how her cousin was filmed trying to urinate on the Centenial Flame or dress up a hero in signage." And for the local Rezidents of Nation's Capital who are pure urbanites with no concept of tractor trailers or their operators ot has come as a huge shock to have these big rigs choking up the roads where they live. And those air horns can be annoying can't they?

22:15 hrs

     I just discovered something that, as a responsible adult (most of the time), really torqued me off. Child proof type safety devices on items used by adults. I know the safety device is meant to prevent kids from getting hurt. But, if you have no kids under the age of ten then you should be able buy one for "adults only" that has no safety mechanisms because you are responsible enough not to use your mouthwash for a mix with your vodka. Took me three minutes to modify the cap so I don't have to squeeze it to get the damn thing off.

     My Lobster and I went for a nature walk through the woods. The district ponied up some cash and enlarged the parking lot. They also redesigned the entrance away from a dangerous blind corner. Good on them. We sauntered through the trees. It was really nice be out off of the concrete. Heard some eagles, may have seen a Robin but it might be a bit early for them. 

     Our daffodils are poking out of the ground. I know you are cursing me if you live to the right of the Rockies.

01 Feb 22

07:15 hrs

     Yes, I slept in. So what. I'm getting up there in age and since I wasn't working today I took advantage of the situation. That being said, the skies were stating to lighten when I got up. Still kinda frosty out. This looks like it will be the third day in a row when we have had no ground fog and looking out from the Wayward Inn I can see the Beauforts to the left of us. Another signal that the seasons/weather is now changing is that the collectors on our solar lights are gathering enough of light to remain on at night for quite some time. Last night the gazebo over the Flame Pit was lit up as Chef Blaine cooked up some veggie patties and weisswurst.

     My Lobster had purchased two slide out shelves to be mounted inside our cupboards. She got them from The Big Box Store. I had seen them before and her purchase made sense since getting older means it's more difficult bend down to root around in the back of a cupboard looking for a misplaced kitchen implement. They are expandable from 12 to 22 inches. Our shelves are 26 across so they don't quite cover all of it. Once I read the destructions it was a pretty simple operation. I needed the help of my Better Half to reinstall the upper shelf as my bad shoulder was not co-operating. The help was gratefully appreciated. 

     That's about it Kidlettes. I can hear the Oma-nator puttering about in the Princess Suite. She doesn't know that I'm up already si she won't come out because she's probably afraid of waking someone up. Not a chance.

     One last thing, the Big Swede is supposed to be shipping me a couple three of the audio recorders he had purchased last year. They are powered  by three AA batteries. I'm going to order some three C cell holders and wire them in. The units will then be able to remain in tbe field for a month or more.

What the hell is that?

20 Jan 22

17:30 hrs

     At about 13:00 hrs today I was absolutely stunned at the sight of this glowing ball traversing the horizon towards the Beauforts. It was something that has not been seen in over the Valley in several weeks. Things are certainly starting to get better here while my Outlaws in the Golden Horseshoe are experiencing a shitload of the white stuff and temps of -20°C like those on the Bald Prairie. Looks good on them.

21 Jan 22

07:30 hrs

     The end of a full work week will soon be over. Maybe I'll be able to finally take down the Christmas lights at the Wayward Inn. Yup, they are still up. The weather was the deciding factor on their removal. Ladders are not steady when placed on ice.

     Chef Blaine had an epiphany. Bacon salt! You can purchase all kinds of flavoured salts - coffee, Sriracha, ghost pepper and others - but is there such a thing as bacon salt? Turns out there is but he found a recipe and has made an attempt. It's not bad. Just three ingredients. Bacon, salt and pepper. What could go wrong?

25 Jan 22

06:30 hrs.

     Yesterday was the Sage's birthday. She was getting so many calls from well wishers that she called me! My Better Half and I played hookey and deeked out to River City on a date. We spotted some interesting new rabbit hutches being built all along the shoreline. The rental rates are just as expensive there as they are here in the Valley. If you have ever driven up there you will know about the massive Left Coast designed house sitting just outside of town. My Lobster took a look on the provincial property assessment site and that particular house has four bedrooms,  six bathrooms, the main floor is 5,000 square feet with 1,400 on the second floor and is valued at 4.million. The cleaning minions must live on the upper floor.

     I have been very busy with work the past few weeks so very little of the next book's rough draft has been scribbled out. I'm hoping to get some done today. 

     We have a new addition to the Wayward Inn. A new LG refrigerator. The previous one had been in place since we moved in and we were having some issues with it. A qualified repair dude had replaced a couple of parts but other issues began to appear. When the big holiday sales were on we went to Home Despot and picked one out. 

     The Oma-nator is still hanging in there. We took her on a road trip to Hub City to see the Onion, who is in residence for her studies. It was a good to drive The Ram on a road trip and listen to the Hemi purr along. 

     There was a major raid on four Island locations carried out by the the Queens's Cowboys. Six people, related to The Angel's, were taken into custody. Evidence collected included large quantities of illicit drugs, weapons and monies. Two of the locations raided were here in The Valley. 

09:45 hrs.

     Have you heard of the big truck rally driving from the Left Coast all the way to the Nation's Capital? They're protesting the vaccine mandate imposed by the government when crossing the border into the Hugh-ess and they want it stopped. The problem is that I don't have time nor the crayons to explain to these idiots that it is the Hugh-ess that is demanding that they be vaccinated. One of the organizers of the rally has stated that anyone attending or participating who is violent or who is advocating a Hugh-ess type Jan 6th Insurrection will be outed and reported to the police. 

26 Jan 22

05:45 hrs

     The fog is still with us. A swirling grey soup that thins or thickens within seconds causing vehicles to appear and disappear right before your eyes. This also means you are slipping in and out of view. Turn on your headlights Kidlettes. Even in the daytime. Be seen and be safe!

     One last bit. Last Friday two Canucks were gunned down in a resort in the Big Chili Pepper. As it turns out they were whacked for welching on a drug deal. Go figure.

C'mon Rain!

09 Jan 22

21:45 hrs

     

     After several weeks of on and off freezing temperatures and even more of the white shit, which is close to being concrete, the rain is beginning to fall. This will make life bearable by melting the snow faster. That, in turn, will widen the roads and once it's all gone I can get the Couch Monkey's to help me remove the Christmas lights. 

10 Jan 22

0730 hrs.

     Last night my friend Gordo and I went to the Auto Hobby shop, a place where men can get greasy, tell rude jokes and twist wrenches safe from the oppression from any Wounded Snowflakes. The objective was to install new LED headlights into The Ram. In the Olden Dayz changing headlight bulbs was a ten minute job at the most. Simply disconnect the wiring, twist off the locking ring, remove the bulb, install the new bulb and then replace the ring and attach the wiring. Done! Even an non-mechanically inclined Neo-max Zoomdweebie should be able to change a headlight. But The Ram is just a little bit different. It's not the bulb that has to come out. It's the entire headlight assembly that has to be removed and to do so you need a metric socket set c/w a three foot extension and a universal joint. You will need your phone too so you can refer to the U-Tube videos produced by those who tackled this job already. Two hours later everything was back in place and The Ram, which my Better is now calling the Frankentruck, had some brighter headlights.

12 Jan 22

07:00 hrs

     There is good news at the Wayward Inn. Our Sr. Loin Fruit has left the seafood counter and is now employed at a local alcohol dispensary. It's another retail position but it will allow him to work weekends while he goes to trade school in River City. I know that he'll do well. Our Jr. Couch Monkey has started his Crim Certificate at the local college. Of course, on the first day, for the first class, the instructor did not show up. He has already dived deep into the late night studying which means we have lost a son and gained a Six Foot Trash Panda who forages for anything snackable that has been left open. 

14 Jan 21

07:30 hrs

     My Sr. Loin Fruit was parking at the start of his new job yesterday. He was backing into a spot when this lady was backing out of her spot next to him. She stopped and the continued reversing but she turned out too soon and tbe front right corner of her car swung out (front end swing) and gouged my son's car. He's going to go through insurance to sort it out. 

     The snow is all but gone but I'm keeping the weight in the back of the Ram for now. You never know what the weather will do here on the Left Coast. Speaking of weather,it seems that the Golden Horseshoe is finally getting hit with winter. Good! 

     My Lobster found out what the rental price for a 2Bed 2Bath unit in the new Rabbit Hucth near the Wayward Inn. Could you believe 2K? And these units are supposed to be affordable housing. Not for anyone working in the service industry. 

More Snow...DAMMIT!

30 Dec 21

10:30 hrs

     The year is almost done. And what a shit year it has been. The current weather is the least of what was shitty. The Beer Flu, extreme high temps with the forest fires and the loss of the Senior Sage to name but a few that were troublesome issues. All of this has started me thinking of my own mortality. 

     As I look back it has been forty years since I joined The Service where I gave twenty-seven years to Queen and Country. The last thirteen years were twice as hard. I am looking ahead to when I and my Better Half will finally be fully retired. What will we do? Where will we go? There is a guy I know from years past. He and his Better Half sold everything and purchased a huge Land Yacht (with a truck towed behind) and they cruise the Island from campsite to campsite. Nice idea put it's  some pretty tight quarters. The chances of going squirrely are pretty high. Then, there are health issues that may crop up ax well as the final curtain.

     At the Senior Sage's service a number of hymns were played for people to sing to and listen to as a slide show of photos scrolled by. I don't know a lot of hymns and I don't think anyone attending would believe for a minute that they would be the songs I would want to be played. I think I would choose songs that meant something to me as I grew up and aged - I would prefer to say mellowed but no one would believe that either. So in no particular playlist order....I give you my Ultimate Swan Songs

See you on the Other Side ... Ozzy Osborne

O'Malley's Break followed by 

Closer to the Heart ...            Rush - Time Machine album 2011

Wish you were here ...           Pink Floyd Pulse album

Stand Tall ....          Burton Cummings

Clap for the Wolfman .... The Guess Who (I want the place to be rockin')

31 Dec 21

06:30 hrs

     Happy New Year Dear Readers!

     Yesterday morning I had a call from the Sr. Loin Fruit. He had been on his way into work and got stuck in the snow on the Big Bridge. He was about four hundred metres from work when the lane he was his was blocked with snow. His low slung car was jammed into a wind row left by a plow. He tried digging out to no avail. He called the Auto Club and was given a place holder. He was Number 19. He also called work and informed them that he would be late.  Numerous people stopped to assist and he eventually got out of his predicament before the tow truck arrived. He did well. He did all the right things and it was a good learning experience. BZ.

     The Onion arrives today for the weekend. My Lobster will be picking her up. She's a delight that will brighten up the Wayward Inn. I wonder what she thinks of all the snow.

     My Better Half and I went to see the Old Brit. She has been in the hospital since September. When asked how she's doing she tells us she is just waiting to pass. At ninety million years old she is in constant pain, has experienced extreme weight loss and her body systems are slowly shutting down. It's sad to see. We have known her for more than a dozen years. She's still pretty feisty but is now slower with her comebacks. The Vultures and Hyenaes are all living deep in the Interior where they are keeping themselves warm dreaming of their inheritance. Screw them all my Dear and give it all to the SPCA or do some local shelter to aid our Residentially Challenged people.

     I spotted yet another Rabbit Hutch going up by the Big Box Store. Like all the rest they will be over priced for mear mortals to afford so question is who is moving into them? I know that neither of my Couch Monkeys can get into any new unit or even an old unit that comes available on the market. And yet the market is there. New Hutches and Warrens are going up at a steady pace. There must have been over a thousand in the last year or so and they're all full. 

     What will your New Year bring you? Our two Loin Fruit will be be going back to school. I know the pressure will be on and I hope they do well. It's part of my retirement plan. Stay safe Dear Readers and I'll see you in the New Year. 

T'is the Season

22 Dec 21

07:00 hrs

     Good Morning Dear Readers, 

     Today you will find me monitoring some contractors in a high security area. How secure? Well, if my phone is on in the area the alarms go off and the guys with guns will soon be enroute. So, no phones. But that doesn't stop me from reading and writing. Yup, I have brought my writing materials so I can pen more of the rough draft for my new tome. I'm already looking at this being a shorter book. Maybe about two hundred pages. My Better Half has mentioned that the directions for any recipes should be a larger font size than the written portions. A great idea that I'll have to play around with. The goal is to educate or guide the single person away from relying on drive through fast foods and delivery services for their meals. I will cover equipment, seasonings, meats, veggies, safety, as well as do's and don't. I don't know if I will have a separate section for the recipes or insert them inside the narrative. What do you think?

     The building that blew up at work last month is still standing. The roof of the centre section has started to collapse and it is unknown if the foundation was not compromised. 

24 Dec 21

23:00 hrs

     I just heard tbe door unlock. Our Jr. Loin Fruit has just come home from dinner at friends. At the Wayward Inn we made a spiral cut ham, mashed potatoes, roasted yams, string beans with shallots and red peppers. After supper our Sr. Loin Fruit assisted my Better Half in building three different wife savers for breakfast. One with meat, one with mushrooms and one vegetarian. 

     People have asked me what I want for Christmas and what I want no one can give me. I want time.  Either, more time to complete all the things I want or to go back in time so I can make sure I get everything done. I'm looking at my own mortality and with tbe passing of the Senior Sage - who I can't get back for Christmas either - my days are numbered. My bones creak more, it is more difficult to get up off of the floor and I'm finding myself more irritable. And the Beer Flu lock downs are wearing everybody down too. 

     L'il Sis made the drive from Cowtown to the Sage's. It took her two days as there was a pile up on The Pass. It was better for her to stay the night than drive it in the dark when it re-opened.

26 Dec 21

12:15 hrs

     Happy Wrestling Day. The day when morons decide to fight their way through crowds of other idiots to save a few bucks on shit they probably don't even need. 

     It is miserable here in The Valley. Temperatures in the negative and blowing snow. You'd think you were back on the Lone Prairie. 

     Well, that's about it Dear Readers. Take care of yourself and stay safe.

Snow!

14 Dec 21

06:45 hrs

     Good Morning Dear Readers,

There was some concern from some of you about the young boy I wrote about in my last blog. I must say that I was surprised by the feedback as I often do not get any. I will tell you again that I di not know what happened to him and as I was not a friend of his father I did not keep in touch. I suppose I could delve deep into the records, I would have to have someone else dotbe digging, and once tbe name was produced start a full blown investigation from out on the fringe. So, it is possible but - and that's a BIG BUT - the risk of OTHERS wanting to know why - and them thinking it's for the wrong reason - is not worth the trouble. I hope you understand. 

     There were a few flakes falling this morning. Nothing to be worried about. It was melting as soon as it hit the ground. Unlike the slope I drove through coming back from Hub City on the weekend. We - my Better Half, the Oma-nator and I - went south to visit The Onion, who has returned from Inja to complete her studies in the Great White North. We took her for brunch and gave her some Christmas gifts. Before going south I had purchased some weight for the back of the Ram. Nine concrete slabs weighing eighty-four pounds each. On the drive home from Home Despot I realized it was a bit excessive so I had the two Couch Monkey's remove three of the slabs. The remaining six will stay in place until February or until after I go to visit the Sage which will only happen if the roads to the Interior are rebuilt.

     Our Sr. Loin Fruit has given his notice in the Fish Department. He's been there for over a year and has done well in light of having to deal with tbe barrage of Anti-maskers along with all the other issues that come with a service industry job. He is still awning on going to start trade school next semester. He'll be commuting to the River City campus. I had asked him if he knew where it was and he said River City. I suggested that between now and the start of the course he should take a drive to check the place out. In my mind it would make things easier in the long run. Did you know that you can't buy Common Sense anywhere these days. Not even at your corner store.

15 Dec 21

06:45 hrs

     Today is Hump Day. Not only that, this is the Sage's Anniversary and although one of them is now gone he is not forgotten. So, it is the life they had built together that that is to be remembered. 

     It is also a miserable wet day. Typical for the Left Coast with wind and plenty of drizzle to go all around. 

     A couple of nights ago I went Down the Rabbit Hole and learned that Veterans and Serving Members residing in our central Prairie Province and in On-tari-ari-oh do not have to pay for a fishing licence. These two provinces have legislated that for their service to the country. Well,thank you very much. There is also a group in the Redneck Province asking their government to do the same. This may be something that I can push onto my legislative representative. It's worth a shot. All they can do is say no.

16 Dec 21

06:45 hrs

     Yesterday I learned that my first base has been anointed with its first female Commander. The base has been functioning for 80 years and finally there is a lady in charge. She is superbly qualified and it will be Interior see how the place functions. The question I have is what happened to the previous guy who was only in The Chair for little over a year. There has been no scandal that darkened his command that I know of that would cause his removal. Maybe, he was only a place holder until this new one had all the boxes ticked to fill the slot. Maybe, the last guy had to be promoted to replace one of the defrocked generals who were accused of an impropriety which dates back several decades. Whatever the reason this change is interesting as it is a brave new world.

     This January will see the final retirement an airforce work horse. The DHC Super Dash 5 - commonly known as the Buffalo. The aircraft has been in service for over 50 years - which is no surprise due to the aversion of mandarins in the Nation's Capital to purchasing new equipment for the military - and it started its career as an army aircraft not the airforce. It's replacement is the POS Kingfisher but that's a whole nother story. I have been informed that even though the Kingfisher will be the new Fixed Wing Sar platform it will not be up and running until 2025 and until then Hercs from 435 Sqn will be deployed here from the 'Peg to fill in the gap. 

     With the imminent departure the drivers are chomping at the bit to accrue as many hours as possible even if it's just to punch holes in the sky and toss some Cheezies out the back. I remember when my first squadron was closing in '84 and our aircraft - the venerable Voodoo - was to be retired. From 01 April of that year to the closure in June the pace of flight ops had doubled then trebled with the aircraft nearly spending more time aloft than on the ground culminating in the loss of aircraft CF-101007. The question now is when will the Hornet be replaced and with what? Will it be replace by another POS? Probably.